My Story. Looking for a guide...

[NoKevin]

Without a thought? No. I find it difficult admitting so, but I cannot.

[Josephkoudelka]

Let's look at thought. When do you know a thought, any thought, before or after the thought occurs?

[NoKevin]

Interesting. You don't. Knowing the thought would simply be another though arising.

[Josephkoudelka]

Interesting. You don't. Knowing the thought would simply be another though arising.

how does choice or free will work given this observation?

[NoKevin]

Choice and free will would then be actions based on thoughts that arise.

[NoKevin]

And since, as Fabiola pointed out, thought cannot be controlled. Which does kind of make sense that I cannot control my actions. Meaning free will and choice arent really possible.

[Josephkoudelka]

At this point in the investigation I'd like to see how clear you are regarding self/no self. How is the illusion of self maintained?

[NoKevin]

Through thought. Thinking I am separate from what is seen.

[Josephkoudelka]

So if you are not a thought, not a self, what are you?

[NoKevin]

It is with reluctance that this is said but I am nothing. There isn't a me.

[Josephkoudelka]

It is with reluctance that this is said but I am nothing. There isn't a me.

Who/what is reluctant?

[NoKevin]

Reluctant thoughts arise. Trying to deny the fact that there is no separate self.

[Josephkoudelka]

Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

[NoKevin]

No. Only through thought does the separate self exist. A very powerful illusion of self only exists as a thought and nothing more. This thought that arises is very powerful however. It seems to be in control and very reluctant to deny being a separate self.

[Josephkoudelka]

No. Only through thought does the separate self exist. A very powerful illusion of self only exists as a thought and nothing more. This thought that arises is very powerful however. It seems to be in control and very reluctant to deny being a separate self.

Let's examine a thoughts power. Notice breathing in and breathing out. Really notice being present and aware of this moment now. Again, home in on the breath if a bit of grounding in the present seems necessary. Now look at thoughts as they appear and disappear. Does one thought know another thought?