Getting untangled

[Tanglier]

LU is focused guiding for seeing there is no real, inherent 'self' - what do you understand by this?
That the self is a delusion, a belief. Specifically that there is a separate entity that we call ‘me’ which is apart from yet relating to the rest of the world. If there is no real self and we can truly believe this, then we can live according to our true unseparated nature. If we can live in this way then we reduce our suffering.

What are you looking for at LU?
I am looking for another tool to move me on the path to awakening. I am hoping that an extended period of one to one work with a guide will help me really address all the assumptions that I have about the self - I say ‘really address’ because I have been addressing them for some time, and in many ways I am intellectually convinced that there is no self, yet I cannot really ‘feel’ it. So I suppose there must be still some delusions holding me back.

What do you expect from a guided conversation?
I think there will be regular day to day contact via email between me and a guide, who will ask a series of questions about my experience of the self and adjust their questions according to the answers that I give. I will be thinking hard about each question and trying to answer it honestly from my own experience. That is what I expect about the process of the guided conversation. If you mean what do I expect as an outcome, well I would hope to be able to strengthen my existing beliefs about no-self and embed them to such a degree that I can actually feel the difference that it makes in my life - a lighter, less thought-tangled existence of greater flow and spontaneity and connection with all that is.

What is your experience in terms of spiritual practices, seeking and inquiry?
After ten years practising mindfulness meditation I wanted to explore more deeply so I joined a local Buddhist sangha, in the Triratna order, in 2018 and became a Mitra in 2020. I have found it very helpful and supportive in moving me along the spiritual path and providing a likeminded community. I have never found meditation an easy activity, but I do treat meditation seriously as a way into discovering the true nature of reality and the self, especially when I follow more insight-based meditations such as those taught by Tejananda. I go on retreat two or three times a year. Recently I have been exploring nondualism and getting a lot out of that. I also read a lot of books of mainly Buddhist spirituality. However, even though I throw a lot of resources in terms of time and effort into my seeking, my progress towards the goal that I outlined above often seems frustratingly slow. I have had two powerful spiritual experiences in this period which have given me a taste of what life could be like if I can truly let go of the self and trust in what is right here rather than want things to be different.

On a scale from 1 to 10, how willing are you to question any currently held beliefs about 'self? 10