Ilona, thank you so much for taking your time to do this with me and so many others!
You are doing such great work here, I can hardly find words for it.
This was really what I needed.
I have been on so many retreats, with quite a few gurus, I have read so many books. And it all felt very important ...

Good morning! Here is a long rant. Not sure if I actually answered all your questions, but it was fun to write anyway.

What is the self and how does it work?

Let me tell you a story.
Once upon a time there was a little baby girl, her loving parents named her Lianna (or Lena, actually), and ...

This morning, or already yesterday evening, I began to think that I had lost it again. Things seemed so back to normal, even if an unusually happy and light normal. One of my expectations was that I would know for certain when the shift had happened. And I did know when it happened, but not as sure ...

New day. Everything is normal, and still... something shifted yesterday, a very gentle shift. And it has not shifted back during the night, it has not been lost. Things move on as usual, and yet not quite. Is this it? This small shift, this gentle change, this normal Sunday life going on?

Is there ...

Thank you, Ilona. Really happy with this! :)

I feel a bit shaken at the moment, just saw something for the first time. Like something irrevocable happened. Sensation of a hole in my stomach, a weird feeling of realness, a bit like the feelings I hadfor example when my father died (oddly enough ...

Yes, of course. I is a thought. Every single time "I" and "me" pop up in this head, they are thoughts. Yes, I see that. I have to really look straight at it to see it. It is hard to let go of that last remaining little I-thought, I have been clinging to it.

I was actually thinking about clouds ...

Your questions are spot on… and they are getting harder to answer.

I get that I am supposed to realize that there is no actor/controller, but this is for some reason harder to see, harder to really look at. At first I didn't know where to start, I just felt stuck.

But then I reread this thread ...

Thank you so much, Ilona! I am really happy about this way of doing it. So far I have had one question to work with each day. In the morning, when I get to work I open the forum to find your new question. And during the workday, I turn it over in my head whenever possible, and write down thoughts ...

First of all – reading lable type 3, and finding my “name” there caused a strange reaction. Like a wave of heat and cold through my body. Resonance. This is true, I thought. Lianna (by Lianna I mean, the “me-self”) is an imaginary character.

But back to work…labels. Yes –
Cateogry 1 and 2 seem ...

Thank you, great but difficult questions!

Where do thoughts come from .. I am trying to really look... They seem to just appear, take form. I have always thought that they were mine, and that I make them happen. But do I?

Is it more like an ”I-thought” claims them just after the fact. Like with ...

The first that came up when I read your question was a feeling of excitement.
There is no separate being ”me” at all in real life! Wow! It is just an illusion, sort of a misunderstanding. A castle built on sand, or rather on nothing. Relief!

I can sense that this is true. But I can't say that I ...

Great, thank you! Let's start!

This is not exactly a list, but this is what I came up with right now.

What my long search boils down to is that I want the truth. No matter what.
On one level, I really have no other expectations, except what comes naturally out of that truth.

On another level, of ...

Yes, please, I really want to find that sign, and pass through the gate.

This my first post in this forum, and it is a bit scary to write it.
I know I am ready, but it feels like a big thing to say that out loud and clear.

First I thought I would have to wait with this until I had enough time to ...