Hi Rowena,
When you look at the word label GREEN, what is the actual experience?
The actual experience is of red letters. Word refers to a different color, so an image of something green comes up in thought(grass,trees). Seeing of red letters and image of grass seems to appear at the same place ...

Hi Rowena

What does that feel like?

This feels like I have lost all my knowledge but all the experience is still 'here'. That feels frightening(to not know anything). That sensation of fear in the body brings me back to Jay's world. Where I know things and kind of feel like I can control things ...

Hi Rowena

I will report to your questions in next post.

Can not seem to shake off a thought "It's me, everything is me. But why do I still take it seriously(my life circumstances), if its just a play. I want to play. Why so serious?" A lot of this kind of thinking. The reason I am stuck is I seem ...

Is there an independent self or 'doer' that can choose to turn seeing off or on? Y/N
No there is no independent self who can turn off the seeing. This makes me feel like I am loosing control over my day to day life. Who would manage my life, take care of my family or better yet how is it being ...

Was it that the sensation labelled 'fear' became absorbed into the sound? Or, that the sensation labelled "fear" became all absorbing?
Its like sound and fear get mixed into each other and I don't know what to focus my attention on. Then there are more thoughts fuelling the fear.
And as the ...

In your direct experience, taking in the visual field in front of you. Prior to any interpretation, labels, etc. Is there an experience of people, trees, houses, animals, apples, oranges, grass, flowers to be found?
When there are no labels, there are only colors(dark,light) and shapes and ...

Hi Rowena,
Where does it feel that the sound is?
I closed my eyes during this inquiry. Sound is just here. Only thought says different sounds are coming from different locations. Like sound of car from road, dog barking far away, sound of tv from inside the room. But in reality all sound are just ...

Hi Rowena,

Are you clear about this last point?
Yes this is clear for me.
Can an actual 'apple' be found in direct experience?
The actual thing(combination of color and shape) is already there in experience before I call it whatever I like. We all just agreed to call it apple when language came ...

I apologize for the typos. I did not proof read it.

I tried the exercises. Could not write it down because I was doing them whenever I remembered during the day(Trying not to do them as chores. I have tendency to do that). I will try to answer the findings as reply to the questions.
Does one feel intuitively 'truer', more spacious, than the other ...

Please could you look at what, in your direct experience, you can find that refers to an actual 'me'.
Is there a separate 'me' that can be found to be located somewhere? Take a look.....
is it somewhere in the body? Where exactly?
Is it always there in the same location?
Does it have an exact shape ...

Hi Rowena,

Sound of the passing traffic - just sound appearing and then subsiding in me

Cold air hitting the skin - just sensation arising in same space as the sound

Worrisome thought about life situation - just a voice(sound) saying a bunch of words in same space(associated fear appearing as a ...

Hi rowena

Seeing wall- color
Hum of fan-hearing
Feet touching carpet-sensation
Taste of hot tea-sensation
Smell of tea- just sensation/smell

Its hard to do this exercise during day while working. Because I have to focus on work being done.

Thanks
Jay

Hi Rowena,
You can call me Jay. I am in MDT canada. Thanks for being my guide.
What do you think will be different when you realize there’s no separate self?
I suppose my seeking will end and I would stop wandering here and there.
What do you expect to happen as a result of this? A little shift ...

LU is focused guiding for seeing there is no real, inherent 'self' - what do you understand by this?
Reality for me currently is divided in two, 'I' and whatever this 'I' experiences. If there is no I then there must be something real that remains without the I. How is that realized? Or is it ...