Thank you so much Elad. It's been such an opening experience for me and I so appreciate your care and warmth. It is the first time I have ever worked with a guide and I am really grateful for the experience. I am at khewitt333@gmail.com

Wow, thank you! What a beautiful offering that so many people are putting energy into this!

Yes. I feel clear and complete on all of this. Is there anything else? Anything I am missing? I don’t feel particularly capable of putting any of this shift into words, except to say I am aware of a pleasant aliveness in my system and all around.

"Beyond description" feels right. Words make the experience seem so flat. It is rich and dynamic, ever changing. I could use words like God, Source, Divine, Life Force... none of them perfectly capture the flow of the universe :) Maybe "flow of cosmic consciousness"?

I also appreciate the way you ...

Sept 10, 2023 (Sept 11 your time): What I am seeing is this: Like seeing hearing, smelling, and feeling, thinking is another aspect of awareness. It happens, no control. Even memories, just thoughts. They happen. What is real is the sensation, the experience. I have a bit of trouble with words here ...

I can feel that investigation is worth a lot more time than I have the next two days. A brief time investigating revealed that it is difficult for me to parse the sensation from the story that my sensations are mine, accompanied by some very deep stories. One is a doubt that other humans exist. If I ...

Is anything ever truly *not* novel, except when attention is narrowed to ideas instead of reality? And so, do you ever truly have control or choice with anything?

Ok, my experience of novelty this morning. As I eat breakfast, I slow down my chewing to arrest autopilot chewing. If I slow down enough ...

Thanks for your warmth. I feel it and am returning it your direction!



1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

A truly separate self, no. Never.

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how ...

I'll need some time for these answers. Heavy work day plus making dinner to take to my mom... I want time to feel into what happens as drop the idea of self/me as doer... right now there is a lot of doing in my life :)

Today: Awareness of the stream of energy coming through means each moment is kind of miraculous. Today I feel clear, spacious, content. Will I still get caught up in my emotions and thoughts? Sure. They seem so real sometimes. And I also feel a kind of distance, a disidentification with thoughts and ...

Having a very emotional morning here. I delayed my trip to see my mom and saw her last night finally, She was SO happy to see me and I am so happy I came. And it is so hard to be in her house without her, and alone. And with the mediation I sit and a voice comes in that taunts me telling me I have ...

Thank you Elad, I feel an exhale of relief reading your words. None of that goes away! Excellent!

When I say I enjoy the illusion of separate self I mean I get pleasure out of of these thoughts of "mine" that seem to emanate from "me" -- the illusion that I am a distinct, separate, meaningful being ...

Hi Elad,
I have read a few chapters of the book (before I began this engagement) and will continue.
Thank you for your sweet words about my time with my mom. It is with her I feel most that I am in the exact present (as she is, because of her dementia) and that the exact presence exists between us ...

Thank you for the warm, lovely reply.
Even imagining writing the loving goodbye letter to the illusion of Xica brings up a lot of emotion. Sadness, anger, resistance and also relief. Wow. This is all fascinating. I had a great talk with a friend tonight who made some beautiful connections between ...

Hi Elad,

Thanks for the reminder that so-called negative feelings are indicators, not bad in themselves.

I'll do this meditation facing a wall (familiar with this from the zendo) when I can. I would like to fit it in over the next week so I can devote some time to it I have several extremely busy ...