Hi Cal

Thanks for your last message, it was very thought-provoking and helpful. I really appreciate this conversation.

This sounds one-down and "others-defining" to me.
I'm a little confused about these words. Just to clarify...
Does "one-down" mean "putting myself down"? And does "others ...

Hi Cal

It's amazing how thoroughly society (all of society seemingly, and perhaps especially people in positions of power and influence such as politicians, news media, online 'influencers' etc) behave as if we are all selves. This leads to thoughts popping up that maybe I am mistaken in my new ...

Do I have to work hard and diligently and concentrate and focus to be aware??? NOPE. Can I be unaware? NOPE.

Hi Cal. Just a short message.

But I can not see this place other than self that I am. I've heard people call it awareness, consciousness etc. But this does not matter or bother me, I do not feel any need to define what 'I' 'really' am, or even to believe that I am anything at all. There is much ...

Hi Cal

Thanks for your message. Very helpful.

My point in this is, you can look into this the same way you did with no self, start to unravel belief systems knowing that [feelings are proof] while seeming true, is incorrect. My teacher taught me that guilt means "I OWE". Whom do you owe for being ...

Hi Cal

Pardon my longer response time. This is because I can see 'no-self' and I am trying hard to look very directly and specifically at my own experience. So each response requires more time to percolate than in the beginning. I hope you are OK with this.

My experience has been that the "self ...

Hi Cal

I think you are in a good place right now, you can see it, and you are letting it settle in.

Sometimes you get caught up in the thoughts, and sometimes you see the process a little sooner. This is how it goes.

I agree. I'm feeling good about this. I am seeing regularly (again and again ...

I will add to the last paragraph.... not only is game playing and fun and connecting happening.... but so are things that, up until now, I would have assumed 'Stephen' needed to be there to DO, to WILL INTO EXISTENCE, to CONTROL. Things such as strategizing, chatting, telling jokes. Even these ...

Hi Cal

I do feel like I've made good progress. It's been very helpful. This learning/seeing puts a very different perspective on things. I see my thoughts from a very different perspective.

It is amazing watching the selfing flare up again and again and again - seemingly, at least thus far ...

Hi Cal

I've had a few thoughts...

Maybe I am getting too much into the weeds with this. Maybe I'm too hung up on the notion that while thoughts are not the same thing as the reality they point to, some thoughts are pointing to aspects of reality more accurately than others.

Maybe I've had a ...

You are making it more difficult on yourself. Apparently your self likes lots of attention, even if because of problems. It doesn't like itself that much, causes you to suffer through stories of inadequacy, and is a pain in the ass even more now because it's fighting back. You should stop feeling ...

Hi Cal

Good to hear from you. I was beginning to fear you had given up, frustrated by my constant conceptualizing.

I am keeping well. I hope you are too.

I’ve been thinking and journaling about ‘no-self’ related stuff this week.

It’s becoming clear that EVERYTHING, apart from what is coming in ...

My fear is that the process will grind to a halt or go 'off the rails', in bad directions etc if I do not maintain strong control with deliberate powerful SELF control/action. Because I believe in my SELF, I believe that my SELF is creating my world, driving the boat - and if my self stopped doing ...

Just now there was a thought..... Who wrote that previous post?

Obvious answer is "I did".

But the correct answer is.... "The post was written." (Although this still doesn't fully make sense to me.)

Now, in this moment, there is a thought that says "I wrote that post!"

A process is happening ...

Hi Cal

I've been a bit frustrated. I felt like things were going well and I was really beginning to see the truth of no 'self'. But then my mind got quite muddled. I have a strong tendency to overthink and overanalyse things.

I've been journaling about 'no self', but today's journaling has been ...