Hey Alex,

You had asked for some examples of decision, intention, free will, choice and control .

I can't find any. I can find thoughts about all of those things, but I can't find a moment, can't watch myself actually make a decision. So far, and I'll keep looking. Or any of the others - intention ...

Hey Alex,

It's been a roller coaster ride, for sure. Everything is a bit surreal. 'I' keep noticing that there is no 'I'. I had a very odd experience. A mutual friend of Jeff and I got in touch with me on facebook the other day, to see if I'm coming up to visit soon. I did have a reaction, my ...

Hi Alex,

Much better today, I slept almost 12 hours last night!

Is it anywhere else? Where does it seem to be? - no, it (the 'I') is not anywhere else. Or it is, in my thoughts, which are real thoughts, but not about real things necessarily.

Do you see what I am pointing at?
So, yes, how ...

Tough night, Alex. Nightmares over and over, waking up with a jump and an adrenaline rush. Lots of thoughts about dying, about how we are all going to die, how none of us knows how long we have. Just really aware of that. I'll think about what you said and reply tonight or tomorrow.
Andrea

And I'd like to get on the facebook page, please.
Andrea

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever? No, Alex, in my direct experience, there is no such entity.

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe ...

Oh Alex! I have not crossed the gateless gate. 'I' have not. There is no 'I' to do the crossing. Wow.
Andrea

Hi Alex,

Thought works like that, it always wants something out of every situation, doesn't it?
Oh yes, and I wanted a lot out of my relationship with Jeff. I'd been single for a long time, was pretty bitter and cynical about men, but he got to me somehow. I wanted a partner, tired of being alone ...

Hi Alex,

What is this emotion we call sadness? Is it any more than a combination of thoughts and physical sensations?

Sadness is just another concept. Yes, it's a combination of thoughts and physical sensations. Why do we call this particular one 'sadness'? I'm thinking about my granddaughter ...

Hi Alex,

Yes, true, its just another story. How do you experience a state? How do you know it is "in me"? Can you describe this in more detail?

I don't experience a state. I thought that I did... I thought the thought 'I'm sad' was descriptive of a state of my mind, but it's not. It's just a ...

Hi Alex,

If not, then it seems we live in story-land, doesn't it? Some might be fun, entertaining, and some sad or frightening. But for who? For the body? For "you"? Who is the one that seems to be in these states? Is the statement "I am sad" any more than a thought arising stating this? It is ...

Hi Alex,

Even when you are perfectly sure that you made a decision, check how it came to be... You will always find a certain trigger that was not in your power that triggered a certain thought, mood or experience. How come you booked the trip next weekend? Did you see an ad on TV, did someone ...

I'm out of town now, Alex, I'll create a longer reply when I get back on Sunday. I'm noticing how I make decisions, it's pretty fascinating.

One of the main defence systems of this thought structure is the expectation of some great spiritual experience - before that "I" will not believe that there is no "me"... sounds crazy, doesn't it..?
No, I don't have any expectations of that, Alex. I totally get the idea of no 'I' - I'm not sure I ...

Before we continue with this inquiry, have a look at why you are here at LU. What is the main reason for this quest?
Happiness? Forget, or rather to be able to control, unwanted thoughts? Disconnect from this "I/self" and find a "higher one" that stands above all these human problems? What exactly ...