Hi NeLi, I'm glad we've had another call. I can see it's tricky to have confidence in the awareness of "no-self" when you feel it always falls away. And that there is a view that things would be SO much better if there was some kind of constant reminder.

Do you have an expectation that a 'true ...

Thank you for sharing all of this NeLi. I can see you're really looking and seeing through the illusion of the identity taking ownership of everything.

Let's keep exploring some of what you've raised. You've shared about the effort of trying to get this all "right".

Who is "trying to get it right ...

Hi NeLi, following our call on the weekend, where you had a break through in your view of the Identity... please let me know what you're seeing now.

What comes up when I say—there is no separate entity self in real life at all?


Remember, what has been seen cannot be unseen. This not about ...

It's great that you've answered this so clearly NeLi. I've been thinking through more on what you've said.

It's wonderful that as you have been contemplating, that feeling of being trapped has fallen away.

I'm going to pull out the comments you've made that are jumping out...

then the "answer ...

Thanks NeLi. It's great to be in this conversation with you :)

Given you've had this experience of seeing through the identity illusion of the "I" several times, let's explore some of what you've shared. (I'll mark the questions I'd like you to answer in bold blue.)

I know you have a lot of ...

Hi CMDancer

Wonderful to get your message, and it's great to see you here :)

(Would you like me to use CMDancer or another name)?

Firstly, welcome to Liberation Unleashed.
Would you like me to be your guide here?
I'm very happy to. Or if you would like another guide, that is also totally fine ...

I'd like us to dive deeper into some of your answers.

You reference back to an "I" that is taking action and that is make decisions.
You said that you are 'awareness' that can and is making decisions.

ultimately after the self is gone there is awareness and thoughts and that's what's important ...

I found reading what you wrote remarkable. Truly insightful. And so eloquently put.
Thank you Cryptic. To me to looks like you have indeed seen through the illusion of the separate self.

Such a remarkable journey, and beautiful how it happened for you on the plane while coming to the retreat, then ...

Thank you Cryptic, it's wonderful to find you here.
Welcome to LU, and this form of enquiry.

From our conversations, and from what you've just written, you've already seen through the illusion of the separate self.

Please say more about that, specifically what has changed in your life since seeing ...

There is one more point, and that is how the self tries to NOT feel and pull back.
The self has it's goal EVERY moment to keep going. To keep it-self to keep going.
It's primary enemy is feeling the intensity of every moment.
It's primary enemy is feeling the FULL intensity of life.
And what is ...

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

No. When "I" look (which makes me laugh)... I don't see any originating self that things come from. No self making "things" happen. "Things" being the reactions, impulses, thoughts, feelings ...

There are still thoughts of doubt, but I doubt them ;)
They seem to be attached to the "I" which seems to have lost all it's ability to believe in itself.

However, there is still much habitual thinking, which is to be expected.
I watch it pass through, get caught up in it - but see that for what it ...

I see desire, wanting, scratching... whatever you call it, as natural.
It is occurring. There is no self behind it, and it can't be stopped... nor should it be.
There is only the flow and this is all I feel. I am "fine" with all these desires, because they are just flowing through, and changeable ...

On Monday I had a very brief Facebook chat with Ilona.
She popped up and said she had some time. I had no idea that a 5-10 minute conversation would result with "myself" view collapsing so quickly. I was shocked. This was not want I planned or even wanted first thing on Monday morning! I had a bunch ...