Well you mad biker, I just want to say thank you so much! That was a brilliant guiding, warm, funny, encouraging, pokey and very clear. I really appreciate your style, there is so much unfolding to be grateful for.

With love and gratitude
'Hannah Brown' aka Mumukshu x x

No, nothing can be observed to be happening in dependence on conditions, it is merely interpretation / labelling happening in thought.

Out of the habit of doubt in my intellectual acuity or depth of understanding I often use the term 'I guess' , keeping things comfortably vague. I can see it's not ...

No nothing can be observed in direct experience, either intention or volition or any sense of making things happen, that is clear to me.

So I guess I'm just hanging on to a concept, and appropriating the 'volitional' element of the skandhas. This is not present in experience, nor can it be. It's ...

Yes, ok that sounds right, I am thinking about the Metta that gives rise to a long term sort of volitional flow of things, as in the positive habits we adopt that give a general flow to life, Bhantes universal evolution if you like, all life wishing to grow, that sort of thing. I can also see that ...

Just remembered something ekes for question two,
Unhelpful comparison has always been a mechanism for creating and reinforcing my illusion of a fixed and separate self, growing up in a competitive family, five girls close in age, I just developed a strong tendency to compare myself unfavourably and ...

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

No there never was a 'separate', 'self', 'me' or I anywhere


2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience ...

That's all very helpful, settling into a deeper understanding. Self-doubt is just a passing thought!


Non separation is Metta and sometimes this non separation is stronger than at other times. Sound familiar?

Yes that's familiar, and so helpful to remember that when feeling non separation it is ...

Ok, in response to your questions,

Have you been able to find, a ‘self’ that is the ‘experiencer’?

No, I can see that the sense of continuity that gives rise to an illusion of self is made up of the skandhas, and reinforced by habit. That covers it all and answers my earlier questions about ...

Yes I agree! That's why they seem so exciting when they do arrive!

That is correct, I can see the truth of this, but feel I am still processing the repercussions, still letting it settle to a deeper level. I feel like I am in a sort of bardo, where it is slowly unfolding, more and more letting go. The Heart sutra resonates more fully each time I recite it, almost ...

Still digesting, but wanting to write while fresh. That feels so true! Experiencing a sense of awe at the simplicity! How daft is that dynamic! There is no judge at the moment but I appreciate understanding that dynamic, and see the point of becoming familiar with the way it works.

Right now there ...

Feeling good to be back home, feeling RELAXED!! Noticing a difference since leaving 10 days ago.

The 'I' does not do anything it just thinks it does! Bless!

These last few days not posting have felt spacious and easy.

Hope you ok?
HB

Seeing the colours of rocks, the shapes of hills and trees, smelling the pine and juniper and rosemary, seeing the vultures wheeling across a deep blue sky, hearing the wind and the birds. Being with Sjt's suffering around the van not starting, then it does! Yippee! Now in its final resting place ...

Ok, thanks x

Hi there, I feel a bit discombobulated! I am sure it's mainly to do with this work, so a good thing if uncomfortable. But also a lot going on here and it's been difficult to really stay in my own space if you know what I mean. Today we are having problems with the van, having got here smoothly and ...