Knocking at the Gate

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smi
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Knocking at the Gate

Postby smi » Fri Dec 21, 2012 10:51 am

Hello,
My name is Milan and I've been on spiritual path for over 20 years. Last decade or so I've been very much interested in non-duality and I've read way too many books about it. So much that I am sort of sick of it and also in love with it. I’ve also been certified as a Sedona Method coach which is based on self-inquiry and I’ve been using in extensively for over seven years or so. I’ve seen many times that there is no me, however there is still doubt and identification. I’m at peace most of the time however there is still seeking going on.
I’ve also read Gateless Gatecrashers and to be honest I procrastinated to sign up this forum and ask for help for over a month. As I am writing this there is fear to go all the way but it seems I just have to take that step. Anyway I feel I am finally ready.
Any guidance would be much appreciated.
Thank you.

p.s. Since I read a lot of non-duality books and been trained in self-inquiry my mind might interfere a bit therefore I could be a bit challenging.

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cosmiK
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Re: Knocking at the Gate

Postby cosmiK » Sat Dec 22, 2012 8:46 am

Hey :)

I'll be your guide.

Here is the standard contract - read and confirm plz :)

1. You agree to post at least every day.
2. I will post questions, and you will answer them.
3. When you answer you answer 110% honestly,
4. and when you do answer, you answer from your direct experience (felt senses and observed thoughts). Long winded analytical and philosophical answers are not needed and may even hinder progress.
5. Put aside all other teachings, philosophies and such for the remainder of this journey. Really put all your effort and attention in to seeing this reality, as it is. If you have a daily and essential meditation practice, it is fine to continue that.
6. Please learn to use the quote function, instructions are located in the link below this line:
http://liberationunleashed.com/nation/v ... ?f=4&t=660

---

have a read of this article on direct experience (dE).

http://this-is-cosmik.blogspot.ca/2012/ ... ce-de.html

---

tell me briefly what your expectations for liberation are?

---

look forward to working with you,

with Love.

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smi
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Re: Knocking at the Gate

Postby smi » Sat Dec 22, 2012 12:02 pm

Hi CosmiK,

Thank you so much for whatever "you will do" with "me". :)

I agree to everything and I have read your article about direct experience.
tell me briefly what your expectations for liberation are?
Well, like I said in my brief introduction I did quite a bit of self-inquiry over the years and I can see quite often there is just thinking, feeling, seeing, sensing, etc. without a "me", without the one who is thinking, feeling, seeing...

However at the moment I am feeling a bit lost or stuck. I don't know anything for sure. I have no idea who or what I am, what to do, who or what is doing, what I am supposed to do, etc. Also I still get identified with almost anything that is happening (stories to some extent, moods, feelings, some thinking, ...).

I guess what I would like is clarity and a sense of direction. I am not sure if there really is a "me" or some kind of center or there isn't.

I have a sense of falseness of everything. Everything seems a bit "fake" (in lack of better words) to me and I have this strong urge or desire to see what is actually going on.

So, in short I would like clarity, direction, and ability to see actual reality and who or what I am.

Thanks again for taking your time to explore this with me.

Milan

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cosmiK
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Re: Knocking at the Gate

Postby cosmiK » Sun Dec 23, 2012 8:23 am

Hey :)
Well, like I said in my brief introduction I did quite a bit of self-inquiry over the years and I can see quite often there is just thinking, feeling, seeing, sensing, etc. without a "me", without the one who is thinking, feeling, seeing...
Great, so we have to look at these areas when there seems to be a "me" doing, thinking, sensing, seeing, etc.
However at the moment I am feeling a bit lost or stuck. I don't know anything for sure. I have no idea who or what I am, what to do, who or what is doing, what I am supposed to do, etc. Also I still get identified with almost anything that is happening (stories to some extent, moods, feelings, some thinking, ...).
consciousness/Life is waking up to itself. It can be a very confusing and disorienting time, but all is happening as it is - no worries :) relax, and put all of your attention on this investigation.
I guess what I would like is clarity and a sense of direction. I am not sure if there really is a "me" or some kind of center or there isn't.
I will be guiding you to investigate this and gain certainty for the lack of a self / i / me. I point, you investigate direct experience, and report as accurately from dE as possible - repeat.
I have a sense of falseness of everything. Everything seems a bit "fake" (in lack of better words) to me and I have this strong urge or desire to see what is actually going on.
Yes, I understand. Insights in to emptiness usually reveal what we have known to be our world/life to be very dreamlike, ephemeral and lacking any substantiality whatsoever. It's all part of the process :)
So, in short I would like clarity, direction, and ability to see actual reality and who or what I am.
here at LU we focus on the Gate, which is the SEEing that there is no self / i / me that does, controls, experiences, thinks and lives Life. Let's keep our focus on that. In the process of seeing what you are not, it may dawn on you what you are, but since there is confusion with who you are already, we do not want to add to that by giving thought more things to label "i" / "me".

For now we can say there is consciousness / Life. This is not some separate thing, but All-That-Is. consciousness is just waking up from its identification with self / the person / the first person character / "you".

As for your expectations they seem fair, but expectations are merely attachments to an imagined future / self and as such won't serve you. drop them, and drop them again. put 110% focus on this investigation, on raw direct naked Experiencing and shining light on all these assumptions - mainly the assumption that there is an "I" that lives Life.

---

so let's get started.

what does "I" / "me" point to in direct experience?

who are you?

with Love.

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Re: Knocking at the Gate

Postby smi » Sun Dec 23, 2012 7:54 pm

Hi,
Thank you for all your comments. Oh my gosh, your questions kept me busy and spinning a whole day. :) I tried to be as honest as possible and here is what came out. I’ll try to keep it very short.
what does "I" / "me" point to in direct experience?
“I” or “me” as a thought or word points to nothing in particular. At least I can’t find anything. However “I” or “me” as a feeling seems to point toward some “indefinite” spot inside my head. The more I try to look at that “spot” it seems more obscure.
I can see how I have no control whatsoever over my thoughts. They simply arise and disappear on their own. Frequently thoughts contain the “I” or “me” thought but that’s just part of thinking I guess. It could as well be any other word repeating over and over.
who are you?
Honestly, I have no idea. I wanted to say this body/mind thing as all the sensations and perception seem to revolve around it. But that is an assumption. I just don’t know how to look or where to look.
Any help would be much appreciated.
Thanks
Milan

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Re: Knocking at the Gate

Postby cosmiK » Mon Dec 24, 2012 5:26 am

Hey,
However “I” or “me” as a feeling seems to point toward some “indefinite” spot inside my head. The more I try to look at that “spot” it seems more obscure.
Do YOU have a body?
Do YOU have a head? :)

whatever this feeling is, it's just another feeling, just another experience, and is NOT self/"I".
Honestly, I have no idea. I wanted to say this body/mind thing as all the sensations and perception seem to revolve around it. But that is an assumption. I just don’t know how to look or where to look.
Okay,

does the body experience?
or
is the "body" just another experience?


we can also phrase this angle of inquiry like this:

is consciousness in the body/mind?
or
is the "body/mind" just another appearance in and as consciousness?


Often what is referred to as the "body" is feeling-sensations (tactile+kinesthetic) which thought labels "body", or even worse "my body". The body is just a habitual labeling, and the "my" an unnecessary ownership addition. the "me" part is self-referencing, and there is NEVER a substantial "me" that can ever be found.
I can see how I have no control whatsoever over my thoughts. They simply arise and disappear on their own. Frequently thoughts contain the “I” or “me” thought but that’s just part of thinking I guess. It could as well be any other word repeating over and over.
Alright, so let's tackle this key point then:

Are YOU the thinker of thoughts?
can YOU think and choose a thought?

http://this-is-cosmik.blogspot.ca/2012/ ... ughts.html
Check this article about thinking.

Let's tackle these angles and go from there,

with Love.

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Re: Knocking at the Gate

Postby smi » Mon Dec 24, 2012 9:38 pm

Hey,
does the body experience?
or
is the "body" just another experience?

we can also phrase this angle of inquiry like this:

is consciousness in the body/mind?
or
is the "body/mind" just another appearance in and as consciousness?
Indeed, body is just another experience. All sensations form a very convincing »picture« that is very easy to identify with. But still, it is only an experience in consciousness.
Are YOU the thinker of thoughts?
can YOU think and choose a thought?
No to both questions. Thoughts appear on their own. There is no control over thinking. I was being very mindful today and was observing thinking and what body was doing. Like thinking, the body as well seems to function on its own. For example I was sitting in a coffee shop and noticed that my hand moved for example, I looked around, I was shifting around in the seat, a lots of minute movements and actions and there was absolutely no one doing/choosing those movements. Even more. It seems everything body does, just happens. Like a computer loaded with lots of software and all programs are just running automatically on their own. No “user” interaction necessary.

Even as I am typing this response, words come, fingers move across keyboard, and nobody is choosing that. There is appearance of some energy moving through the body, but no one is doing anything.

But there are still thoughts like “there must be someone there”. There is still doubt and fear that I am just being delusional.

Kind regards
Milan

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Re: Knocking at the Gate

Postby cosmiK » Tue Dec 25, 2012 7:47 am

Hey :)
Indeed, body is just another experience. All sensations form a very convincing »picture« that is very easy to identify with. But still, it is only an experience in consciousness.
And just to make sure. Do you a see a 'consciousness' that is separate/aware of experience?
No to both questions. Thoughts appear on their own. There is no control over thinking. I was being very mindful today and was observing thinking and what body was doing. Like thinking, the body as well seems to function on its own. For example I was sitting in a coffee shop and noticed that my hand moved for example, I looked around, I was shifting around in the seat, a lots of minute movements and actions and there was absolutely no one doing/choosing those movements. Even more. It seems everything body does, just happens. Like a computer loaded with lots of software and all programs are just running automatically on their own. No “user” interaction necessary.
Nice insight/experience. Take it a step further. is there anything that YOU can control? ever? at all? even a tiny bit?
Even as I am typing this response, words come, fingers move across keyboard, and nobody is choosing that. There is appearance of some energy moving through the body, but no one is doing anything.
Yep... we can say... just typing, just sensations, just words, just thinking (which are all just labels too, just like a "self" is, but more accurate to dE than saying "I am typing, I am sensing...")
But there are still thoughts like “there must be someone there”. There is still doubt and fear that I am just being delusional.
Yes... as you have seen they are not YOUR thoughts, so you have to really consider if they can be trusted with providing clarity about 'this' that IS, or Reality, or Life, or consciousness.

there is fear, but fear for what? for who?

there is doubt, but doubt about what? about there being a self? well... check in direct experience. thoughts will weave all sorts of stories, as you have already seen, now it's time to nakedly LOOK, to nakedly SEE, to simply just notice the simplicity that IS.

wonderful progress and clarity so far.

I don't think this is required, but it may be good to just clarity. An article about Doership.
http://this-is-cosmik.blogspot.ca/2012/ ... rship.html

Happy Holidays Milan,

Lots of Love.

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Re: Knocking at the Gate

Postby smi » Tue Dec 25, 2012 9:31 pm

Hello CosmiK,

Happy holidays to you as well and thank you once again for guiding me even during this holiday time.
Indeed, body is just another experience. All sensations form a very convincing »picture« that is very easy to identify with. But still, it is only an experience in consciousness.
And just to make sure. Do you a see a 'consciousness' that is separate/aware of experience?
Well, this doesn't make sense to me. As I am looking there is no separation between consciousness and experience. Experience is consciousness and awareness at the same time. In other words there is no separation between experience and consciousness. For example as I am looking at my hand there is no separation between hand, looking and awareness. It is one and same. Though my mind is completely baffled about this.
No to both questions. Thoughts appear on their own. There is no control over thinking. I was being very mindful today and was observing thinking and what body was doing. Like thinking, the body as well seems to function on its own. For example I was sitting in a coffee shop and noticed that my hand moved for example, I looked around, I was shifting around in the seat, a lots of minute movements and actions and there was absolutely no one doing/choosing those movements. Even more. It seems everything body does, just happens. Like a computer loaded with lots of software and all programs are just running automatically on their own. No “user” interaction necessary.
Nice insight/experience. Take it a step further. is there anything that YOU can control? ever? at all? even a tiny bit?
There is no control at all and there never was.
But there are still thoughts like “there must be someone there”. There is still doubt and fear that I am just being delusional.
Yes... as you have seen they are not YOUR thoughts, so you have to really consider if they can be trusted with providing clarity about 'this' that IS, or Reality, or Life, or consciousness.

there is fear, but fear for what? for who?

there is doubt, but doubt about what? about there being a self? well... check in direct experience. thoughts will weave all sorts of stories, as you have already seen, now it's time to nakedly LOOK, to nakedly SEE, to simply just notice the simplicity that IS.
Yes, fear and doubt is just another bundle of sensations and thoughts happening to no one. Looking behind them there is nothing. Just emptiness or space or silence or plain nothing.

I have also read your blog about doership and conducted a few experiments today and I definitely agree there is no doer.

Another stumbling block for me at this point might be an idea, since there is no driver there must be a passenger who is just observing the ride. I am probably taking a step back but after looking at all this and seeing there is no me there is still a lot of confusion. This whole thing is such a paradox that I just don’t know what to make out of it. I would definitely like to explore this even further. This whole “no me business” is just raising more questions. Any further suggestions would be much appreciated.

Kind regards
Milan

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Re: Knocking at the Gate

Postby cosmiK » Wed Dec 26, 2012 6:16 am

Hey :)
Well, this doesn't make sense to me. As I am looking there is no separation between consciousness and experience. Experience is consciousness and awareness at the same time. In other words there is no separation between experience and consciousness. For example as I am looking at my hand there is no separation between hand, looking and awareness. It is one and same. Though my mind is completely baffled about this.
Yes!!!

just 'this',
no separation.

:)

do you have a 'mind'?
look at what the word 'mind' points to. what is that?
There is no control at all and there never was.
Yes.
Yes, fear and doubt is just another bundle of sensations and thoughts happening to no one. Looking behind them there is nothing. Just emptiness or space or silence or plain nothing.
Yeah!
Another stumbling block for me at this point might be an idea, since there is no driver there must be a passenger who is just observing the ride. I am probably taking a step back but after looking at all this and seeing there is no me there is still a lot of confusion. This whole thing is such a paradox that I just don’t know what to make out of it. I would definitely like to explore this even further. This whole “no me business” is just raising more questions. Any further suggestions would be much appreciated.
Yes. It is just an idea. So let's investigate this idea.

"I" as the Doer has been seen through, but this sticking point is the "I" as the Observer/Witness/Experiencer/Perceiver. Does that sound about right?

So... firstly... you have already seen that "there is no separation between hand, looking and awareness.". So... knower/knowing/known are all just thought-abstractions over Experiencing... over consciousness, over 'this'. Keep staring at this simplicity beyond simplicity.

Second... investigat this again in direct experience. There is clearly awareness/knowing. But is this a separate passenger/self/"I" that observes?
Stare deeply at the line/point that seemingly divides knower/knowing & known. Is it there?

Third... a paradox for who? confusion for who? is there a self there that doesn't know what to make of all of this?

LOOK for this self that can be confused...

Is it the character Milan?

does the character Milan have any awareness? has the character Milan EVER done anything? thought anything?

I can tell you from here... the character cosmiK has ZERO awareness, and only This-That-Is / Life / consciousness is aware of itself through all of these wonderful forms (not like there are separate forms and a separate this, as you have seen, just for communication purposes). At this moment there is typing and a screen and an imagined character cosmiK typing to an imagined character Milan... but none of those characters has any awareness at all. Please LOOK deeply in this.

is it Milan who wakes up? or is it THIS that wakes up from an imagined "Milan"?

Lots of Love.

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Re: Knocking at the Gate

Postby smi » Wed Dec 26, 2012 11:23 pm

Hello,
do you have a 'mind'?
look at what the word 'mind' points to. what is that?
There is no mind. It is only a concept.
"I" as the Doer has been seen through, but this sticking point is the "I" as the Observer/Witness/Experiencer/Perceiver. Does that sound about right?
Yeap, that sound just right. :)
So... firstly... you have already seen that "there is no separation between hand, looking and awareness.". So... knower/knowing/known are all just thought-abstractions over Experiencing... over consciousness, over 'this'. Keep staring at this simplicity beyond simplicity.
I find this part a bit challenging because as I look there is so much going on it is hard to focus just on one thing. For example I pick a sensation or anything that is perceived and very often it is accompanied by other sensations and thoughts that of course try to claim ownership. However there are moments of calm and at that moment there is really no separation between observed/observing/observer. It is one and the same.
Second... investigat this again in direct experience. There is clearly awareness/knowing. But is this a separate passenger/self/"I" that observes?
Stare deeply at the line/point that seemingly divides knower/knowing & known. Is it there?
In moments when there are no distractions there really is no such line/border. But as stated above this is much less obvious to me as it is with doership. I have seen many times in the past that there is no doer but in the last few days this has become really very obvious. No so much with seer/observer/knower.
Third... a paradox for who? confusion for who? is there a self there that doesn't know what to make of all of this?

LOOK for this self that can be confused...

Is it the character Milan?

does the character Milan have any awareness? has the character Milan EVER done anything? thought anything?
Confusion is just “noise” happening to no one. :) A habitual rant so to speak.

There is perception of character Milan but character Milan itself is not. Character Milan is only an image in consciousness just like any other image – a chair, desk, computer, etc… So, no character Milan does not have “awareness” and never did anything.
I can tell you from here... the character cosmiK has ZERO awareness, and only This-That-Is / Life / consciousness is aware of itself through all of these wonderful forms (not like there are separate forms and a separate this, as you have seen, just for communication purposes). At this moment there is typing and a screen and an imagined character cosmiK typing to an imagined character Milan... but none of those characters has any awareness at all. Please LOOK deeply in this.

is it Milan who wakes up? or is it THIS that wakes up from an imagined "Milan"?
Milan who? :) I don’t know about THIS but there is change in perceiving. Character Milan seems to be “melting” and loosing status as a “boss”, the one in charge. Though there is still lots of identity it is much less solid. I believe there is still some holdback with seer/observer/knower.

I find your every suggestion very helpful and there is much gratitude.

Milan

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Re: Knocking at the Gate

Postby smi » Thu Dec 27, 2012 11:03 pm

Hello,

Okay, I get it. There really is no character cosmiK. :) Just plain silence. :)

Just kidding.

I though I'd post an update about my progress. I reread all your articles from your blog many times today and paid attention about what was going on.

Life goes on as usual however there is this subtle difference about thinking and perceiving. I am still noticing that practically everything that is happening is completely automatic. Body moves, action happens, responses happens, thinking is happening and there is still identifying mainly with perceiver and body.

I took a very long walk today and it was interesting to notice there was no effort about it. I walked many miles with no tiredness whatsoever.

Also I noticed I am taking "my" thinking much less seriously. Though there is usually still identification with the perceiver of thinking.

I guess that's all for tonight.

Kind regards
Milan

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Re: Knocking at the Gate

Postby cosmiK » Fri Dec 28, 2012 12:21 am

Hey :)
I find this part a bit challenging because as I look there is so much going on it is hard to focus just on one thing. For example I pick a sensation or anything that is perceived and very often it is accompanied by other sensations and thoughts that of course try to claim ownership.
Are there 2 or 3 or 4 or 5 things to focus on?

thought conceptually divides Experiencing, but Experiencing is a shifting seamless whole.

what shows up in/as awareness, here, and now, is Experiencing. just that.

in whatever shows up, does it show up to anyone? is it experienced by anyone?
However there are moments of calm and at that moment there is really no separation between observed/observing/observer. It is one and the same.
Regardless of whatever moment, is there EVER any separation? really look in to this.
In moments when there are no distractions there really is no such line/border. But as stated above this is much less obvious to me as it is with doership. I have seen many times in the past that there is no doer but in the last few days this has become really very obvious. No so much with seer/observer/knower.
Alright, so from direct experiencing, identify exactly what it is that leads to the conclusion that there is an observer separate from what is observed?

Also... do you see that any "line/border" that is seen is just that... another experience? even the experience of a noticer separate from the noticing is STILL just another experience. even the experience of an experience-er experiencing experience is STILL just another experience.
Though there is still lots of identity it is much less solid. I believe there is still some holdback with seer/observer/knower.
Just like the character Milan has no awareness, and has never done anything, it is the same with any assumed observer/witness. An "awareness"/witness/observer that is aware of stuff is just another repackaging of the individual. Individuality is any assumption of a separate something apart from everything else. So really look. Are you making an "I" out of this witness/observer?
Life goes on as usual however there is this subtle difference about thinking and perceiving. I am still noticing that practically everything that is happening is completely automatic. Body moves, action happens, responses happens, thinking is happening and there is still identifying mainly with perceiver and body.
Yes... thought claims the "body" (which is just another appearance) and claims some abstract "perceiver", but just notice that "I"dentification is just a self-referencing loop that points to nothing substantial... perhaps some sensations, and some thoughts. Follow those assumptions to try to see if there is an identifier or anything that can be identified with? See if identification is possible without thought?
I took a very long walk today and it was interesting to notice there was no effort about it. I walked many miles with no tiredness whatsoever.
No to be pedantic... but is it clear that there was no "I" walking... but more accurately... JUST the appearance of walking miles in awareness?
Also I noticed I am taking "my" thinking much less seriously. Though there is usually still identification with the perceiver of thinking.
As you know, they are not YOUR thoughts, just conceptual bubbles showing up in this self-aware living consciousness that IS.

and there may be a thought about identification with the "perceiver".

but look deeply.

is Identification actually possible? Who identifies? with what?

Lots of Love.

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Re: Knocking at the Gate

Postby smi » Fri Dec 28, 2012 10:56 pm

Hello cosmiK,

So, here is the latest update. On another long walk I took a slightly different perspective thanks to your suggestions.
I simply allowed myself to simplify everything that was happening by labeling it as experience. So during walk, walking was happening = experience, noticing of trees = experience, feeling »I am watching« = experience, a sense of observer = experience, some thoughts = experience, etc… By using this approach it became obvious that there is only experiencing. There is no separate “entity” out of experience. It is only ever-changing flow of experiencing. Period. No self, no me, no “I”, no character Milan.
I find this part a bit challenging because as I look there is so much going on it is hard to focus just on one thing. For example I pick a sensation or anything that is perceived and very often it is accompanied by other sensations and thoughts that of course try to claim ownership.
Are there 2 or 3 or 4 or 5 things to focus on?

thought conceptually divides Experiencing, but Experiencing is a shifting seamless whole.

what shows up in/as awareness, here, and now, is Experiencing. just that.

in whatever shows up, does it show up to anyone? is it experienced by anyone?
It doesn't matter how many "things" are happening. It is only an experience in ever-changing flow of experience or shifting seamless whole as you labeled it. You were right. It truly doesn't matter how many things are happening or what is happening.
However there are moments of calm and at that moment there is really no separation between observed/observing/observer. It is one and the same.
Regardless of whatever moment, is there EVER any separation? really look in to this.
There is nothing separate - ever.
In moments when there are no distractions there really is no such line/border. But as stated above this is much less obvious to me as it is with doership. I have seen many times in the past that there is no doer but in the last few days this has become really very obvious. No so much with seer/observer/knower.
Alright, so from direct experiencing, identify exactly what it is that leads to the conclusion that there is an observer separate from what is observed?

Also... do you see that any "line/border" that is seen is just that... another experience? even the experience of a noticer separate from the noticing is STILL just another experience. even the experience of an experience-er experiencing experience is STILL just another experience.
All pointing of feelings/thoughts/sensations is just an experience pointing to another experience. But there is no center anywhere. No separate observer/watcher outside of experience.
Though there is still lots of identity it is much less solid. I believe there is still some holdback with seer/observer/knower.
Just like the character Milan has no awareness, and has never done anything, it is the same with any assumed observer/witness. An "awareness"/witness/observer that is aware of stuff is just another repackaging of the individual. Individuality is any assumption of a separate something apart from everything else. So really look. Are you making an "I" out of this witness/observer?
Before today that was the holdback. Today it became really obvious the dance of experience looping on itself, but there is really no such thing as a witness/observer. Or any separate identity at all.
Life goes on as usual however there is this subtle difference about thinking and perceiving. I am still noticing that practically everything that is happening is completely automatic. Body moves, action happens, responses happens, thinking is happening and there is still identifying mainly with perceiver and body.
Yes... thought claims the "body" (which is just another appearance) and claims some abstract "perceiver", but just notice that "I"dentification is just a self-referencing loop that points to nothing substantial... perhaps some sensations, and some thoughts. Follow those assumptions to try to see if there is an identifier or anything that can be identified with? See if identification is possible without thought?
Like described at very top, when everything is reduced to simple experience, it is very obvious there is nothing separate. In ever-changing experience it is impossible to identify. Who/what with what? So, yes, without some frequently repeating "anchor" like certain thought or sensation it is impossible to identify.
I took a very long walk today and it was interesting to notice there was no effort about it. I walked many miles with no tiredness whatsoever.
No to be pedantic... but is it clear that there was no "I" walking... but more accurately... JUST the appearance of walking miles in awareness?
Yes, definitely. Using "I" is still very good for communication purposes. :) But there is no "I" walking or doing anything. Actually there is no "I" at all.
Also I noticed I am taking "my" thinking much less seriously. Though there is usually still identification with the perceiver of thinking.
As you know, they are not YOUR thoughts, just conceptual bubbles showing up in this self-aware living consciousness that IS.

and there may be a thought about identification with the "perceiver".

but look deeply.

is Identification actually possible? Who identifies? with what?
Again, here I would just repeat what I already wrote above.

As "I" noticed this looping of experience pointing back to just more experience, everything is so simple that its kind of baffling that almost nobody notices it.

Right now there is just curiosity about nothing in particular. There is sitting and typing happening and almost no thoughts whatsoever. If some thoughts do come up they also disappear very quickly. Observer/witness took a position next to doer. That is - just a bunch of ideas about nothing in particular. It seems funny how could they ever hold such a "significant" position.

Kind regards
Milan

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cosmiK
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Re: Knocking at the Gate

Postby cosmiK » Sat Dec 29, 2012 12:50 am

Hey!
By using this approach it became obvious that there is only experiencing. There is no separate “entity” out of experience. It is only ever-changing flow of experiencing. Period. No self, no me, no “I”, no character Milan.
absolutely. well done!
Before today that was the holdback. Today it became really obvious the dance of experience looping on itself, but there is really no such thing as a witness/observer. Or any separate identity at all.
Yes!
So, yes, without some frequently repeating "anchor" like certain thought or sensation it is impossible to identify.
Right. Identification and thought is synonymous.
Yes, definitely. Using "I" is still very good for communication purposes. :) But there is no "I" walking or doing anything. Actually there is no "I" at all.
Yes yes yes!! "I" is just a thought. There is no actual "I" at all!
Right now there is just curiosity about nothing in particular. There is sitting and typing happening and almost no thoughts whatsoever. If some thoughts do come up they also disappear very quickly. Observer/witness took a position next to doer. That is - just a bunch of ideas about nothing in particular. It seems funny how could they ever hold such a "significant" position.
Yes... the thought-created center has been de-throned by referring what is actually going on... alive and non-dual consciousness, seamless Experiencing, Life's expression, whatever we want to call it!

Wonderful :)

Your answers are very clear!!

Here we go...

Is there a separate self in any way, in any form?

&review:

do YOU control / do anything?

can YOU choose?

are YOU the thinker of thoughts?

is there an "I" that experiences experience?

does Milan the person exist?


after answering those...

answer this.

are there any doubts about seeing through the illusion of the separate self?

Lots of Love.


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