But on the other hand, i struggle with some of the exercises... Like I'm missing something? Like I'm expecting something completely different? I don't know...
Yes…and the key word here is EXPECTING.
I think that what "I" expect to "happen" is to lose the idea of the Ray (individual), but when this happens, shouldn't I be able to experience from everything/everywhere? Should I be able to experience from the coffee mug's perspective, and the table's, and the chair's and the dog's at will?
"I think" might be a clue to your seeming conundrum! You are not LOSING anything. How can you lose what doesn’t exist? All that happens is that you see that what you thought you were is just a story.
Ray…I want you to ponder this carefully. There is NO Rayself NOW who is reading this, and there has NEVER HAS BEEN a Rayself…EVER. This idea that you should be able to experience the perspectives from a coffee mug….how can this happen..when there is no Rayself who is experiencing anything and there is no such thing as a coffee mug! Is a coffee mug known? What is the AE of a coffee mug? What is the AE of a dog?
Secondly. THIS/experience itself seemingly APPEARS as these ‘things’ but does not BECOME them. So how can ‘things’ have perspectives. There is no Rayself that has perspectives! That is all part of the story…the dream! You (not Rayself) ARE the appearance of the story of being someone trying to become oneness!!
To experience "the taste of ice cream", you would have to be separate from the taste of ice cream. But if you are "taste of ice cream", you can only be aware of being the taste of ice cream.
Do you see the difference?
There is no becoming ONE with every ‘thing’. That points to separation. We did the following exercise back on the 26th of April. If you are clear on this…then how can you expect to become one with ‘things’? Go back and read your responses to these questions.
Look at the display before you.
When seeing it, is there any division between seeing, see-er, and the seen?
Are these three separate?
If yes, can you find the boundary between the three? Not an imagined, conceptual boundary, but an actual boundary that can be perceived with one or more of the senses?
Like I mentioned, I experience things without labels almost all of the time now. I guess I have to deal with my expectations, but how do I deal with expectations of something I've never been thought? The only thing that I can think of is to simply let go of any expectation and keep going with the process...
We looked at expectations when we began this exploration together. Expectations are nothing more than an idea (thought) – a mental concept. A meaning is given to both the expectation and the current experience which are then compared and labelled as “liberation” or “not liberation” because of how it is being perceived, and for the desire for liberation to look the way we want it to look/feel. Every expectation is in the way of seeing what is here, right now. Every single expectation is a ‘hindrance’ in realizing what IS. There is nothing to be done with expectations, other than to become aware of them.
Seeing and knowing are one and the same. Seeing of colour and seeing of seeing are one and the same = colour. Are seeing and knowing separate or are they one and the same. Is seeing of colour and seeing of seeing different, or are they are one and the same ie colour?
The "Seeing" through the body's eyeballs (see-er/seeing/seen) is so ingrained in the "mind" that it's really hard to think without it... Hmmm, which means, it's all thought/illusion, not Raw Experience (X).
Look at whatever is in front of you. Is it seen from the perspective of two windows (eyes), or is it like a windscreen view? Now zoom back in and try to find the thing that’s seeing. Is there seeing separate from what’s seen, or is there just what’s seen? Is there any awareness separate from experience or is there just experience?
The question is…how do you feel now compared to when we started the exploration?
I do feel a real perception shift has happened. The effect of this shift affects every aspect of life. I just don't know if there is more to be done, or am I lost in semantics, language and definitions... (thought).
Is seeking still going on? And I mean seeking…not questions.
What has changed and what has stayed the same.
Yes…assumed points to thought. And are those thoughts pointing to AE or to further thought?
The seeing is assumed to be happening, but cannot be found, and the see-er cannot be found either.
What does ‘assumed’ point to?
"Assumed" points to thought.
But the expectation is that if this is the case, shouldn't there be an obvious change in perspective, or viewpoint, or perception when this is realized?
No..that is another expectation. Some have a light bulb moment and for others it is a subtle shift. The litmus test is how you feel, not what you know.
Realising 'no self' happens, but there will also be periods of checking, and doubting, and rechecking, and that is all normal. This exploration is just a beginning and not an ending. There will still be beliefs and patterns that are rooted in the idea of being a separate self that will need clearing as not everything gets rewritten in one big hit...so yo-yoing happens. There is clear seeing that there is no self and in the next moment this clarity is muddied...all normal experiences. The core belief of being a separate self is seen through though; and like a rug that is beginning to unravel, there are still many knots that need undoing. But if you know that the ‘conditioning’ is not something that you own, then it is easier to clear. Continuing to LOOK after the realisation is very much the key.