Final Countdown

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Truthcounts
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Re: Final Countdown

Postby Truthcounts » Wed Jan 04, 2017 1:06 pm

Back at work today I notice that I can meet colleagues openheartedly where before there was more avoidance. The more sarcastic attitude turned into cheering up. There are more smiles and touches reaching me.

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Ilona
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Re: Final Countdown

Postby Ilona » Thu Jan 05, 2017 8:55 am

Wow, sounds like a lovely turn of events.
Can you say with a big fat YES it is clear for you what the illusion of a separate self is and if so are you ready for the final questions? Or would you rather wait a few days to see how it goes?

Have a wonderful day!
Truth realized will set you free.
http://ilonaciunaite.com/book

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Truthcounts
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Re: Final Countdown

Postby Truthcounts » Thu Jan 05, 2017 9:07 am

Dear Ilona,

sleep was fine this time and I got up early. I sneaked into two different Satsang Videos this morning- the teachers explanations about the self appear too complicated by now. Own insights show up instead.

I am ready for the final questions.

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Re: Final Countdown

Postby Ilona » Thu Jan 05, 2017 9:20 am

Sweet! Here they are :)

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

5) Can you talk about decision, intention, free will, choice and control? What makes things happen? How does it work? What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.

6) Anything to add?

Please answer in full, when ready.

Much love.
Truth realized will set you free.
http://ilonaciunaite.com/book

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Truthcounts
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Re: Final Countdown

Postby Truthcounts » Thu Jan 05, 2017 1:41 pm

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me', 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

There is experiencing but nobody experience is happening to. Though in the waking state there are some pretty stable patterns appearing in perception close around which seem to move in an outer world, all perception of seeming "me" and seeming "world" is equally "next to each other" in a perception continuum and not separated into inner and outer. It never was - it was just attention being lost in an inner movie about an "I" story which veiled, filtered or boxed direct experience of the here now. There is clarity now that my name is not a label for someone who experiences but that this seeming one is an experience itself - an imagination on thought level.

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

The illusion of seperate self is hypnosis resulting from taking the helpful instruments language and imagination for real though they are only meant to play around with for practical things. It was like believing that a character of a movie could step out of the screen and overlooking that in real life the seeming observer does not sit before a screen but could better be described as being locked in in the screen himself. It was the illusion that everything that moves must have a steering entity within, like a car seems to be steered by a driver while overlooking that the driver is as driven as the car.

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

It is a relief in the sense that not everything happening that does not fit into the current identity of an "I" comes with resistance and effort or a discomfort about incompatibility. There is openness and allowing for what happens and according ease and flow. The idea of an "I" is available for convenience in communication but not believed in. Unpleasent feelings may still come but are not taken personal and can pass through more easy. Positive feelings are less sentimental. Love and gratitude show up more and destructive thoughts diminish. There is a more continous awareness about the whole field of body sensations or vibration instead of being lost in imagination. The head feels more like open space.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

The last push was when sitting with my shoulder pain and realizing that resistance existed in the form of the wish for a happy end of the story of the pain-sufferer. Seeing this revealed the inner TV - which veiled direct experience - as illusory.

5) Can you talk about decision, intention, free will, choice and control? What makes things happen? How does it work? What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.

Before there existed the belief that I could steer this body/mind like a driver his car and that there are first thoughts that command action. But thoughts just become aware with their appearance and are not created before.

6) Anything to add?

This journey was not about trying to replace a bad illusion by a better illusion. This journey was about truth, which revealed to be the direct experience of body-sensing, feeling, seeing, hearing, smelling and tasting in the here and now not veiled but only accompanied by mind activity with its imagined inner voices, pictures or movies. Life just plays out as a totality.
I see two major hurdles that made it so hard for me to realize: the fate as womb twin survivor, which left a steady alertness in the nervous system, and the widespread error that senses cannot be trusted but that mind can create. It was a long way to sort out reality and illusion again but the result is deep trust in the truth of what is. No need to worry any more about a seperate entity leading a life or an essence surviving through reincarnations. What a boring idea compared to the touching here now.
Life is for sharing and what could be more deepening than walking others home. So as soon as this thread gets affirmed as crashed I am ready to develop into guiding others.
Thank you so much Ilona for not letting me escape once more and sending me so much love - your wonderful being touched my heart.

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Ilona
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Re: Final Countdown

Postby Ilona » Thu Jan 05, 2017 9:42 pm

Thank you very much! My heart is touched too. Your answers sound clear and I'm happy to welcome you to LU community!
You know, this only a beginning of real exploration, now when the core belief was busted, the rest of the structure built on that belief will fall. It ain't always pretty. There may be a honeymoon period. It's very helpful to have someone to talk when you feel lost in doubt. You can always write to me and also participate in sharings, discussions in the groups.

I'm very happy to hear that you like to pass it on and guide! Yey! It's the best way to deepen realisation as you get to look at this from different angles and ask questions you never asked before.

It was my pleasure to work with you.
Much love.
Truth realized will set you free.
http://ilonaciunaite.com/book

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Truthcounts
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Re: Final Countdown

Postby Truthcounts » Fri Jan 06, 2017 4:25 am

Dear Ilona,

this forum is such a blessing. What a wonderful idea to make realization transparent by recording the threads. This is so infectious to read all these people crash - every new one is deepening the trust for others that it is also open to them. As guiding itself is challenge enough I would like to start in the German forum and ask Joram for mentoring, with whom I started off here. And I already learned that I will have to join facebook which I will take care of this weekend ...

Thank you so much again for your loving pointing and the groundwork this is all based on - it will be even more pleasure to meet you "in person" once this arises.


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