Ready

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brightlight
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Re: Ready

Postby brightlight » Thu Apr 30, 2015 12:37 am

Actually it's not that they're tricky questions, if worded better, they are fascinating. 'How' questions. How does it work? It's a more honest accurate paradigm to consider 'the world' and to investigate life.

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KevinD
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Re: Ready

Postby KevinD » Thu Apr 30, 2015 1:24 am

Marvelous, Bhante, this feels very clear here.
I'm going to give you the final questions, it seems like there is already very clear seeing here.

Here are the questions:



1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?





2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you seeit now.





3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.



4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?



5) Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control. What makes things happen? How

does it work? What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.



6) Anything to add? 
"Don't ask the mind to confirm what is beyond the mind. Direct experience is the only valid confirmation."
~Nisargadatta Maharaj

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brightlight
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Re: Ready

Postby brightlight » Thu Apr 30, 2015 7:09 am

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?
No and no.
2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.
The illusion of separate self is a misunderstanding of the conglomerate of rapidly occurring sensory expeeriences. It is a paradigm where processes are seen, interpreted as 'things.' Things don't actually exist, only processes. Things are solid, unchanging, or I should say they are believed to be so. Things are false beliefs. Even ideas written right here are only a process. If the ideas in them become/are perceived as things, that is a make believe paradigm. Both the idea of I and otber only exist in the make-believe paradigm. Sort of like we can see a movie as a process and it is as if we take still frames like a pboto from tbe movie and it then appears to be frozen, captured, solidified, made unchanging, i.e. a thing. Of course even a photo is not a thing but seems perhaps moreso than a movie. (I used to be a pbotographer by the way). Craving for existence, being a thing, and fear of not being a thing. Hahaha, craving and aversion give rise to delusion which gives rise to more craving and aversion and...etc. What came first, the chicken or the egg? Answer not at all important. It is it's own process, a binding, a stuckness. That bound flow has it's own taste so to speak, nature, tendency, going round in a self perpetuating like an eddy in a river, a place where the flow is 'stuck' even though still fluid.

Blah blah blah
3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.
Paradigm shift is all that has happened. Everything happens just the same but understood as processes and not things. More awareness of direct experience as flow. Example, tbinking with the flavor of doubt still arises, about this whole process. Seen clearly as just thinking and then hard to take seriously. Doubting HAPPENS as opposed to doubt IS. Thought is a ghost, it's content insubstantial, hard to roll in it. No I to roll and no it to be in. Easy to see how much suffering arises due to not seeing this as it is. Before 'I' would get caught up in 'it' and ensuing suffering would be 'mine.'
4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?
Hahaha, I have read many other posts and see a clear aha moment in many and then a clear bit that pushed them over. This experience was different. It was like already being across the finish line but not understtanding that the race was over so to speak, the gate was already crossed through. Needed some help to recognize the finish line. So yesterday on alms round it all became clear. There was a knowing at that time that what was to be understood was being understood. The gateless gate makes sense. People talking about flow and.pattern make sense. Buddha's teachings are more clear.

On reflection, there are memories of 'getting it' before but not fully understanding the comprehensiveness of it. Example: the creative process. Where do new ideas come from? On a Goenka retreat maybe 12 years ago it was clearly seen that ideas just appear then immediately 'I' takes credit for it often looking for praise, sometimes getting it, sometimes blame or judgement. Dukkha. MY dhukkha. Funny I have even been 'teaching' people about this. Like doubt, it's not personal. It has it's own nature, flavor, arises and passes. It is not our doubt it is.just.doubt. Now understanding.is it isn't even doubt. It is doubting, a flavor of thinking. Also the 'big' insights I've had before in meditation were essentially the same yet the extraordinariness of those experiences stood in contrast to ordinariness. There has been a feeling in the last two years that the same insight was being approached yet from an ordinary mundane everyday way. I also had a sense that the time was ripe, the signs were tbere so to speak.

It is a bit crazy to be writing and expressing at all. I see that in writing I am using ordinary conceptual speak and yet knowing tbe process is the new paradigm. It's like being on the edge of two paradigms/dimensions at the same time!

Blah blah blah
5) Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control. What makes things happen? How
does it work? What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.
Decision=illusion.

Intention. Thinking still associates intention as sankhara which nothing more than an arising urge or push, an impersonal component of the flow. This still seems correct. It is certainly not an I or will based phenomenon.

free will=illusion

choice and control=illusion. Thoughts manifesting with feelings of uncertainty, fear. Swirling in an eddy. Bound flow. Flow seems to flow differently when seeing something untrue as true. Illusion believes in itself and creates its own make believe problems so to speak. The 'I' is nothing more than that. Fascinating.

There is no 'what' that makes things happen.

How does it work? Not sure yet. Want to study energy and observe process phenomenon, causality, etc. I know more about how it doesn't work. Certainly not like the content of 'I' thinking.

Still responsible in a mundane and societal sense for behavior but such happenings won't affect the flow in the same way as false beliefs about self which lead to fear, shame, self consciousness, anger, victimization, etc. Those thought processes may or.may not continue to run. Either way they won't be seen as personal, not 'mine.'

Experiences: doubt has arisen in the thought stream. For a moment the habit of 'my doubt' arose with mild disturbance in the thought and sensation. This felt familiar. In the past it was remembered as thought that this would compound and proliferate until it didn't, hahaha flow would change, eddy out in kayakers terms. Instead, thinking with the flavor of doubt arose and was seen directly as just thinking and no proliferation happened.

There is an urge to say 'I'm tired of writing' but it seems like those are the words of a puppet in a puppet show. I think you get what I mean.
6) Anything to add?
What more to say then simply thank you very much Kevin.

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KevinD
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Re: Ready

Postby KevinD » Thu Apr 30, 2015 7:52 am

Nicely done, Bhante.
I'm just letting a couple of guides look this over to see if they have any questions.
It doesn't happen right away, so bear with us.
Best,
Kevin
"Don't ask the mind to confirm what is beyond the mind. Direct experience is the only valid confirmation."
~Nisargadatta Maharaj

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brightlight
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Re: Ready

Postby brightlight » Thu Apr 30, 2015 7:54 am

Thanks

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KevinD
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Re: Ready

Postby KevinD » Thu Apr 30, 2015 8:16 am

Bhante,
One of the guides wants answers to the following questions:

In question 4 you talk about being on the edge of two paradigms/dimensions.
'Could you explain what you mean by ' being on the edge of two paradigms/dimensions at the same time ?'

And from Question 5, What is the actual experience of responsibility - are you responsible for behaviour and society?
"Don't ask the mind to confirm what is beyond the mind. Direct experience is the only valid confirmation."
~Nisargadatta Maharaj

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brightlight
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Re: Ready

Postby brightlight » Thu Apr 30, 2015 9:53 am

'Could you explain what you mean by ' being on the edge of two paradigms/dimensions at the same time ?'
It's impossible to explain in nonconceptual terms. One paradigm is conceptualizing, one is mere direct experience of flow. The question above asumes there is a 'you' to explain something. It is a nonsensical question. There is no I and there is no you either. There is no conversation either between 'you' and 'I' but it would appear that way from the old bound pradigm. And typed words still come out that way in the old paradigm which no longer truly exists except perhaps as a hologram.It's like another dimension. Nothing written can ever express it. Writing is happening, a combo of.many things. The content.written is meaningless. It may point but it will never be it. There is no 'it.'
What is the actual experience of responsibility - are you responsible for behaviour and society?
There is no I. The question makes no sense in that regard.There is only process. Forget what was written. It's all blah blah blah. The reality is the process of writing, dynamic. The content can never hold, trap, capture, preserve experiencing. The words on a screen as ideas or concepts don't hold any truth. The writing doesn't exist, only the sensory experience RIGHT NOW of what is known conceptually as 'reading' by that process that was once collectively mistaken to be 'you.'

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KevinD
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Re: Ready

Postby KevinD » Thu Apr 30, 2015 8:30 pm

Hi Bhante,


I'm happy to let you know the guides are satisfied, as am I, that you've seen through the illusion of a separate self.

I've been in touch with LU admin to get you 'turned blue' and they'll soon contact you with invitations to the various groups etc.

Please pass on to me your Facebook details so I can have admin offer you access to some of the forums.

It's been fun working with you.


Best of luck,

Kevin
"Don't ask the mind to confirm what is beyond the mind. Direct experience is the only valid confirmation."
~Nisargadatta Maharaj


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