confusion

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Ilona
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Re: confusion

Postby Ilona » Tue Mar 11, 2014 9:01 am

Hi bid.
Lovely to see you here! Keep them answers coming :))
Truth realized will set you free.
http://ilonaciunaite.com/book

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Re: confusion

Postby bid » Tue Mar 11, 2014 1:00 pm

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

The illusion begins with labeling, or seeing the labeling as an indication that there is separateness - ie. believing in the illusion. This tends to manifest itself when I think I am experiencing ‘other’. In seeing through this illusion there appears to be more space around ideas/concepts and in this spaciousness reactions are slowed down and in the slowing down they can be examined/noticed. And when they are noticed they can be seen through, like the illusion of self. So triggers can also be spotted and therefore no longer act as triggers to indicate separateness but triggers pointing to old beliefs. This all seems to lead to a much more peaceful experience of existence/life.

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Re: confusion

Postby Ilona » Wed Mar 19, 2014 8:38 am

Lovely answer. Keep going! :)
Truth realized will set you free.
http://ilonaciunaite.com/book

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Re: confusion

Postby bid » Fri Mar 21, 2014 9:41 am

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

The illusion begins with labeling, or seeing the labeling as an indication that there is separateness - ie. believing in the illusion. This tends to manifest itself when I think I am experiencing ‘other’. In seeing through this illusion there appears to be more space around ideas/concepts and in this spaciousness reactions are slowed down and in the slowing down they can be examined/noticed. And when they are noticed they can be seen through, like the illusion of self. So triggers can also be spotted and therefore no longer act as triggers to indicate separateness but triggers pointing to old beliefs. This all leads to a much more peaceful existence.

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Re: confusion

Postby bid » Fri Mar 21, 2014 9:44 am

Sorry about the repetition, didn't realise there was another page.

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Re: confusion

Postby bid » Fri Mar 21, 2014 9:57 am

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

Okay, so without the idea of self to cling to, it’s easier not to take things personally. When someone says something to me, I’m not constantly thinking is this a criticism or they don’t like me or any number of other self destructive thoughts. Instead I listen, here words and react from a place of ‘clarity’ I notice if emotions come up and attend to them rather than allow them to take over. Noticing seems to be the key. Noticing if I’m spiraling into thought, I check to see if it’s useful or not, then I either drop the thought or investigate further. Often I find I just move on, life continues to be.
I’m very aware that from my description it seems like there is conscious effort involved in this behavior, but here’s the thing. From all thoughts it feels possible to get to ‘no-thought’ not that there’s a deliberate action in this, I’d describe it more like a ‘flow of existence’ a moving through the world, being both the world and not the world…language falls apart at this point. As the truth is I cannot describe this experience. All I know is, life seems much more a present experience, not bound up in worrying about what’s come and gone.

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Re: confusion

Postby bid » Sat Mar 22, 2014 8:25 am

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

It’s difficult to answer this question; life just began to live itself differently. The insight into the illusion of self definitely started the ball rolling but I couldn’t say why or when things began to shift. Not constantly questioning Why? is this happening but focusing on What? was happening made a big difference. I look because I wanted to change, I see because I’m open to truth, I continue because it works…

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Re: confusion

Postby bid » Sat Mar 22, 2014 9:03 am

5) Can you talk about decision, intention, free will, choice and control? What makes things happen? How does it work? Give examples from experience.

As soon as I become aware I’m in thought. It feels like this;
I say to myself this is thought, is it useful or not? If the answer is not, it’s as if I can switch it off, or redirect my awareness to something different, like light or breath or sound (what I might call ‘’direct experience’) The phrase’ non-stick’ could apply, stuff just doesn’t hang around like it used to. The body/mind moves on. Things like worry, anxiety, panic, therefore have less hold over my experience.
A guy shouted at me the other day, he was angry something had happened that had caused him an inconvenience and he needed to take that out on me. I was responsible for his problem but it wasn’t deliberate it was just circumstantial. I noticed adrenalin but didn’t experience fear as I may have done in the past. I spoke calmly, tried to explain, didn’t get angry. This all just happened I wasn’t deliberately thinking or acting, however I’m sure it went this way because I wasn’t seeing the experience from a point of view of I, this is happening to ME. It was all just as it was, no labels needed.
Seeing through the illusion of self, there’s a noticing of another storyline ‘I have redirected my experience’ and so and so…
Experience seems to be a reaction to present conditions; someone asks you a question you respond, you go outside, it’s cold you come inside put more clothes on, - thought appropriates these actions and says ‘I did that because I felt cold’ but really it just happened. Therefore all ideas that we have any control over anything are just ideas or more precisely thoughts. Free will is a thought, choice is a thought, control is a thought. Life just Lifes and even that is a thought.

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Re: confusion

Postby Ilona » Mon Mar 24, 2014 9:25 am

Beautiful, bid. Welcome home! :)
And as you know, this is just a beginning, there is so much to explore and many more realisations to come. But I see you are good to go! :)

Are you on Facebook? I'd love to invite you to the groups for after-gaters.

Sending love!
Truth realized will set you free.
http://ilonaciunaite.com/book

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Re: confusion

Postby bid » Mon Mar 24, 2014 12:54 pm

Yes I am on facebook, I'm known as Richard James Biddle.

Thank you so much for all your help.

Sending love back, bid


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