Goosh... let's do your work here.

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mag
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Re: Goosh... let's do your work here.

Postby mag » Mon Sep 17, 2012 8:30 am

Good, keep doing the BLOP-exercise. In the meanwhile I will explain you the concept of "I-thought".

Say silently in your mind: "I will get up from this chair now".

"I will get up from this chair now" is a thought.

This thought "I will get up from this chair now" has another thought in-built in it, integrated into it: the "I" thought.

We could say that "I" thought is a "pre-thought", because the pre-thought "I" needs to be there before it is possible for an "I" to "get up from the chair" or to do anything else.

So, in each thought of yours "I this or that" there is an "I" thought integrated into it. "I" is an assumption, but is made so quickly that is difficult to question it by oneself. Our mind has hypnotized us in believing the "I" into existence.

The "I" thought is just a belief. It doesn't point to any object "me" (even if you may feel so at the moment), and this is what we will be investigating soon.

Does the previous make sense?
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Re: Goosh... let's do your work here.

Postby Goosh » Mon Sep 17, 2012 10:54 pm

Yes thats very clear. Thankyou.
Now I shall do the blop exercise as I lie in bed.
..or perhaps there could just be lying down and observing of thoughts floating and blopping.
Thankyou dear mag.

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Re: Goosh... let's do your work here.

Postby mag » Tue Sep 18, 2012 1:12 pm

Can you point with your finger to where is 'me'? Can you find any "me-ness" from any thought?
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Re: Goosh... let's do your work here.

Postby Goosh » Tue Sep 18, 2012 11:07 pm

Yes thats very clear.
Just now, I thought I would sit and blop some thoughts. Interestingly I almost immediately thought of why I needed to get up and do something. I know its an excuse... I dont want to face my anihilation!
...and how many I's in that?

Yes I Get that now..... there is an underlying I in just about every thought.

Right now it feels so real.
sounds.... feelings about sounds.....annoyance.....who is annoyed?

Its no good. no amount of analysis will make the feeling go away.
I need help.

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Re: Goosh... let's do your work here.

Postby mag » Wed Sep 19, 2012 4:32 am

I dont want to face my anihilation!
No need to worry, it's just imaginary "I" that is annihilated, a thought only, the body will be very alive without the fictious "I" center.

Can you answer my question:

Can you point with your finger to where is 'me'? Can you find any "me-ness" from any thought? Can you find any "me-ness" from anything if you investigate for yourself?
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Re: Goosh... let's do your work here.

Postby Goosh » Wed Sep 19, 2012 7:41 am

pointing finger.... no not really..... but looking at the types of thought and feeling... they are very ME.... full of me ness...
I am finding it hard to escape from the wall to wall inner conversation.

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Re: Goosh... let's do your work here.

Postby mag » Wed Sep 19, 2012 7:49 am

What makes thoughts your thoughts? Do they a name tag with your name? Do more of the BLOP-exercise to get the sense that it's possible to disidentify from thoughts. A thought "I'm a man/woman", doesn't tell anything about who you are, it's just a thought. You don't need to BELIEVE in thoughts that appear in empty space.
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Re: Goosh... let's do your work here.

Postby Goosh » Wed Sep 19, 2012 11:41 pm

'What makes thoughts your thoughts?'
I have managed to commit myself to SO many responsibilities during my working day that the thoughts occupying me are mostly my plans for the next day. . . I have so much that needs planning and co-ordinating.

...perhaps the thoughts are Mrs Job thoughts.... not mine. I am not a job!
.................
,

Now I feel tangibly less beseiged!

SPACE.... The sound of tinkling silence.....blood flowing through my body.... the labels arriving after the experience..... screen into focus.... out of focus...... softness under me pressing into my back, my bum, my legs....... air soft around the body.... all supporting... all part of the same .... all is ONE.

Thoughts are trying to connect with the previous mind set..... What was I trying to explain to you about my thoughts... That they were VERY IMPORTANT THOUGHTS that belong to a VERY IMPORTANT JOB.
Not belonging here though. They have slipped off me.... like I was teflon!

Still silver silence.... softness.... oneness. Real ....solid.. HERE.....NOW......
Who is I? Eyes flickering! watching, looking ....like a lizard. Rumbling intestines, breathing, heart beating, a body, alive... a creature ...!

Walls, bed clothes, things, plants... all pulsing with the same energy... atoms, forces, gravity, spinning, all moving, inter related, intricate complexity held in / by / within / for/ because/ ONE!

All is the same as it was 20 minutes ago.... BUT also totally different.

I dont want to sleep because this experience is so exquisite!

Will I know this when I wake up?

Dear mag, Stay with me a while longer... I may need you to pull me back again tomorrow.

Good night.

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Re: Goosh... let's do your work here.

Postby mag » Thu Sep 20, 2012 7:23 am

Once you stop beleiving in existence of an "I", you are awake from the dream of the mind. But the journey continues from there to deeper level of awakenings, more on a bodily level.

How would you describe the illusion of "I"? Can you notice how "I" is just a pointer that doesn't point to anything concrete? Can you find a me somewhere in body, thoughts or sense perceptions (experiences)? Or anywhere else?
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Re: Goosh... let's do your work here.

Postby Goosh » Sat Sep 22, 2012 12:28 pm

I is the seemingly superfluous prefix to almost every thought or thing I say. I had no idea... Why does it need to be said SO SO much.... Am I, (is it ) trying to persuade myself (itself)?
It is an emphasis that gives itself a sort of importance. Only now as I message you and think to myself about packing my things for my weekend away, do I recognise how empty these I and my and me s are.
I cant find where I is located. The way It is constantly referred to is the only way it can exist in even a cloudy thought form. It now appears as a very childish pretence. The my s are just a way to extend my childish king of the castle me ness.
The words have a power though. Saying them, as I do, either in my thoughts or out loud, make it seem normal and real to have this pretend self.
Not saying them is difficult but in actual fact describes the way things really are , better.
I cant find ME. I am rather glad I cant, as ME is rather limitted and as I seem to be discovering, just pretend. When I was a child, I thought as a child.... etc. ... the time has come to put away childish things.....
Right now, I cant find I and dont believe in it. What a relief!
I wrote this last night but it never sent. Let me try and send it now.

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Re: Goosh... let's do your work here.

Postby mag » Tue Sep 25, 2012 5:08 am

Do you feel that you have seen through the illusion of self, or is there some doubts still?
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Re: Goosh... let's do your work here.

Postby Goosh » Wed Sep 26, 2012 12:49 am

My self is the concept that enables me to hang on to my train of thoughts. So without it they are just misty bubbles. I have seen through and seen behind the illusion of SELF .... and being without its filter is so beautifully spacious and real.
But I am still reacting to life's challenges as though SELF was real.
How do I integrate this understanding into daily life?

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Re: Goosh... let's do your work here.

Postby mag » Wed Sep 26, 2012 1:03 pm

When thoughts appear why do you believe them? Why do you think that you exist as a personal being? What are those false selves that you are trying to maintain and project?
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Re: Goosh... let's do your work here.

Postby Goosh » Wed Sep 26, 2012 11:17 pm

Thoughts come and go. When they are MY thoughts they stick to me... I feel that if there could be sufficient time between thoughts here might be a break in the continuum that is called I, and it might cease to be. Unfortunately it is still here.
I dont believe the thoughts..... I think them. I dont try and maintin and project a Self. I am trying to live wihout it.

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Re: Goosh... let's do your work here.

Postby mag » Thu Sep 27, 2012 5:10 am

What is the evidence that you think thoughts? Can you tell me how thought appear and disappear in your immediate experience?
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