Awareness is one of the labels for this which is right now.
Are you aware of it, or „you“ is a thought appearing in awareness?
Are you having this experience, or „you“ is part of the experience?
Awareness is clearly aware, even when "I'm" not directly aware of it (say when caught up in something). So "I" must be within awareness. But this is a thought, not direct seeing.
I've been trying to look (and not think) about this all last night & this morning and feel kind of like we four are sitting in an empty 8 x 10 room and the three of you are calmly telling me that there is no elephant in the room and somehow I keep having this thought that for sure, I can feel it breathing on me.
Yes: I know, it's just a thought, that's all. BTW, are any of you surgeons by trade and if so, would you mind taking a scalpel to my brain?!?!
Sigh. I can also sense for a moment here or there that "I" is just part of the experience-- floating about in the midst of Eloratea's coffee cup. But to be honest, "I'm not going to get this" is the general flavor of my current experience right now. Which by the way, is the oldest story in this particular character's playbook.
Are the liking and disliking anything other than familiar and habitual reactions? Is it possible for you to see them as they are before the label "I" has been slapped on top of them?
Yes. I can see them just as programming playing out within experience. The contraction/sadness/fear that arises still feels (sorry for being daft...) personal though. I "know" these are labels for sensations with a big MY attached to them. For many years I've been "practicing" just allowing them to be, watching them flow, seeing the thoughts that drive and sustain them. I can even see the "MY" (size of billboard). But I guess there is always an underlying current of not wanting the contraction/sadness/fear to be there anymore... which I know is not what this is about.