I also have some confusions about the possible paths and choices ahead... You may explain this to me so that it is all sorted out perhaps.
There are paths where the ego is not ditched but one sees truth at the same time, apparently. In the Western Tradition and in some Eastern Traditions there is something generally called the Left Hand Path, where a part of the illusion is maintained while realization also happens. In the end a solar-lunar form of the 'rainbow body' is attained, instead of just a solar one. I don't know what it means to have an ego and realization at the same time, some describe it as the 'serpent swallowing the sun' or as the 'drop of water absorbing the ocean' instead of the 'drop of water dissolving in the ocean'. "There is a part of me that is not divine, but all of the divine is me". I am still registered in a mystical order of this type, but felt like seeking a 'direct path'. But i still have attachment to these descriptions and goal which i don't understand well, and i see the change in mindset i'm seeking as an help, acceleration, or facilitator of it.
You already have an idea that this is just a dream/movie... you are trying to see this as that. What is here without this idea? Is there reality?
Awareness is here without that idea.
I think there is an absolute reality, from my perspective it seems to be awareness itself. But awareness can't help but see everything within it as real. It can't look just at itself and forget its contents, wherever it is, the contents are also there. (As you made me notice; There is no awareness separated from things happening).